Why Work-Life Boundaries Have Become Important for My Mental Health

I didn’t know how much I actually sucked at maintaining boundaries until my anxiety began to overwhelm me over a year ago. You’re expected to play so many roles as a person, both personally and professionally, that the lines between the two can blur to the point of non-existence.

Growing up, I was surrounded by messages of pride and confidence having to arise majorly from the work you do and the career you have. Landing a government job was tooted ubiquitously as the be-all and end-all of making a living but I never subscribed to it. “So you’re a black sheep of the family, huh?” someone said to me once. Yes. Yes, I wholeheartedly am. But not with ease.

I think the fact that I eschewed working towards a position in the government made me work that much more harder – too hard, in fact, as a way to prove that by doing so, I’m not a complete and utter idiot. I studied hard, became obsessed with doing assignments just so and my brain literally crumbled in the process.

I’ve mentioned this before, but I became harder on myself than anyone else could be. Nothing I did was ever good enough. If I didn’t do well by other people’s definition then I was failing.

I’ve had to learn to put up boundaries between my own expectations and those of others after what you could call a breakdown after graduating university. Partial seizures, anxiety and panic attacks formed my daily life for months on end.

I have always been an ambitious and intense person. My work-mode consists of me starting on a piece of work and forgetting to eat or breathe until everything is done. Start-stop is just not how I’m wired, which is why when the work day is done, I literally need to switch off; otherwise it starts to feel like a never-ending circle and I break down. So yes, I have had to work on those boundaries and make an effort to slow down by a lot.

Scrunchie – Forever 21
Earrings – Accessorize
Shirt – Here&Now (via Myntra.com)
Trousers – Mango
Heels – Old

I’ve been extremely lucky of the understanding that has been shown towards me when I do set my boundaries. I understand how competitive our world is and how much we have to sacrifice in order to meet the definition of “hustling” or working hard. But I’m just no longer willing to sacrifice my actual mind to it all anymore.

Autumn is Here and I’m Pumped

What is it about autumn that makes me feel more mellowed? Maybe it’s a sub-conscious reaction from when I was back in school and knew that freedom wasn’t far away. Also, hello? Christmas? Yasss, bring on the pastries.

Shirt – The San Francisco Jeans Co. via Pantaloons
JeansRoadster via Myntra.com
(I cut the bottoms off because I wasn’t into the rings detail.)
Shoes – Forever 21

Also, dressing for fall is so much nicer. The chillier breeze hasn’t really settled into town yet. I don’t need a sweater in the day as much as in the evening, but I do look forward to more layers, more textures and more neutral colours.

I was in Delhi recently and have “fall-en” (get it?) in love all over again with H&M. Their fall-winter collection is divine. I need all their trousers and sweaters. I’m not wearing H&M in the images but let me tell you, I have been inspired and I’m thinking of styling some of my H&M bits for this season in a video. Maybe.

Also, UNIQLO is in India now. I mean, expensive, but have you seen their rainbow offerings in the basics section? I have been known to Google images of their shop floors because their displays can be so colourful. I didn’t have a chance to stop by after their recent opening but I have my fingers crossed for another time hopefully coming soon.

Oh heyyy, UNIQLO. Don’t take too long opening your e-commerce site, ey?
*Bank account cries in Japanese*
UNIQLO is a Japanese brand.